


The Pretty Butterflies With Glass Hearts

by Katsudon_p28



Category: BLACKPINK (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Angst and Feels, College, F/F, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Sad, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, cutie rosie, fem!reader - Freeform, hank the dog - Freeform, highschool, nerd reader, rosies still just an adorable art/music nerd
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2021-01-20
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:42:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,526
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28038612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Katsudon_p28/pseuds/Katsudon_p28
Summary: I've planned for a lot of things; my career, my life, my death. It just so happens that the storm of loving you wasn't one of them.Now, won't you come back and we can be our old teenage paradises?
Relationships: Park Chaeyoung | Rosé/Reader
Comments: 4
Kudos: 23





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Uhhh, yeah, so this is kind of an introductory chapter. I do plan on finishing this rather quickly, though, seeing as winter break is coming up. :) Enjoy!

Junior year. You were so pathetically awkward. Always stumbling over words, shuffling instead of walking, you never smiled. It was like you were afraid to even exist. In all honesty, maybe you were.  
~~~~~~~~  
You decided you weren’t going to bother with anyone a long time ago. It wasn’t worth the time or the effort. School was not for mingling, it was for academic achievement, it was there so you could prove to everyone that you were the best. You remember it all like the back of your hand. Your mothers screaming face as you gripped your report card in your hand. The hand that came down again and again. _A C, you had gotten a C._ You shook your head, now was not the time to be thinking such things. That didn't matter anymore. As you calmed down and tried to collect yourself, you saw jet black hair whip past your face. You felt books colliding with your back; your own falling to the floor. You heard a breathless “I’m so sorry” with the accent that made you sure of the fact that you were knocked over by someone who clearly wasn’t from around here. Looking up, you saw a sheepish girl with catlike eyes brimming with concern. You’d never seen her before, she must be a transfer. _She has beautiful eyes_ , you thought. Despite the movies and books, you were not so overwhelmed with her beauty that you forgot what had happened. You stood up, picked up your books, and scowled at her. Who on earth did she think she was? Who walked without paying attention to anyone around them? You were so lost in your own annoyance that when you finally focused on her once again, you saw that her eyes had begun to tear up. Your scowling face softened with surprise. You hadn’t meant to make the poor girl _cry_.  
“Are you alright? I’m sorry”. You grimaced, first you behaved like a pissed off cow, and now you hand her a half-assed apology?  
“No, no no I’m sorry. I wasn’t paying attention, I’m very- I’m really sorry.” She squeaked before she scurried off down the halls. 

Who on earth was that? She had an Australian accent and the prettiest eyes. She had the kind of beauty and demeanor that one would often associate with a dominating, no bullshit kind of attitude. And yet, she teared up at just a scowl. “How odd”, you thought. Shuffling your way to the nearest empty classroom for break, you let your mind drift off towards the usual questions you asked to pass the time. "What were you going to eat for dinner, how many seniors were going to laugh in your direction, how much should you study when you got home", things of that sort. You turned into the English classroom and sat at a random seat near the back. You were placing your books down and taking out your bag of celery sticks to snack on when you heard a sniffle. It was usually quite empty here given that everyone wanted to spend the 20 minute break outside, or in the halls. Only you and a few other of your classmates were in the room. When you turned around, you came face to face with the girl from before. She was holding a few pills in her hand and looked like a deer caught in headlights. Seeing you, she quickly shoved the pills into her pocket and avoided your stare.  
“Please tell me you weren’t about to get high right now.” You joked, you had just made the girl cry and now she was sitting right behind you. “How lucky”, you mused.  
She giggled. That was a good sign.  
“It’s just my medication, don’t worry I’m not getting high back here.” She said.  
“That's good. I’m really-. Well, I’m sorry about earlier. Please forgive me. I didn’t mean to behave like a complete asshat.” You avoided her eyes, if you looked at them you were sure you’d begin your nervous stuttering. Your fingers went down to play at the hem of your hoodie, distracting you from the beautiful brown cat eyes boring into you.  
“It’s fine, really. I just tear up sometimes, my eyes- they’re very, you know, sensitive.” Her tone quieted as she went on. She was adorable.  
“What’s your name? Mines Y/n L/n.” You questioned.  
“My name’s Park Chaeyoung, or Roseanne Park. I have two names. You can call me Rosie, Chaeyoung, or Chaeng. Whichever you’d like”.  
“Alright Rosie, you have pretty names.” You cursed yourself. What kind of response was that?!  
She snorted. “You have a pretty name too, Y/n.”  
You felt the conversation dying and you panicked. At the time, you didn’t know why, but you wanted her to never stop talking to you.  
“I- uh.. What medication were you about to take.” The realization that that was quite personal and invasive to ask washed over you. You flushed red and hurriedly rushed out a “You don’t have to answer that, I'm sorry.”  
“Oh. It’s completely fine. Those were just for my heart. I have a- uhm. I have a condition.” She fiddled with her pink painted nails.  
You cautiously put your hand over hers. “Her hands are so soft” you thought. You weren’t the best at this. To be honest, you were absolutely horrible at this kind of thing.  
“I’m sorry. Hey, if you want you can have my heart.” You joked. The implications of that statement completely flew over your head until you saw Rosie turn a peculiar shade of red.  
“Do you...do you say that to all the ladies?” She tilted her head back up, flipping her hand over to hold your own, staring you down.  
You almost keeled over right then and there. Maybe it was the sun shining down on her perfect, slightly wavy hair, or the eyes that bore into your own with mirth dancing in the brown irises. Perhaps it was the way she smirked at you, her slightly puffy cheeks squishing up making her look like an adorable chipmunk. You opened your mouth to respond and the only thing that slipped out was a weak “I- erm. No?”. God, you were ready to toss yourself out the window a few feet away from you. It was about a 4 story fall, if you played your cards right and positioned yourself just so- you could totally get a one way ticket to ghost-land.  
Chaeyoung grinned, her cute cheeks puffing out, her soft looking lips pulled up into an adorable smile.  
“Good. Maybe you can keep it just for me.” She whispered.  
You felt your heart stop, your mind freeze. You pulled yourself together just enough to reply, “Of course, my heart is all yours, Chaeyoung.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, I really have nothing better to do with my life other than churn out chapters. Honestly, kind of iconic :). Enjoy!

You believed Rosie would forget about you; it was a one time meeting. Sure, it was full of flirty banter, but that's all it was. However, an entire school year later, the girl still followed you around everywhere. Of course, it wasn’t quite as annoying as you thought it’d be. Turns out, you both shared a few classes your junior and senior year. Not to discredit her or anything, but Rosie was surprisingly very intelligent. Sure, she always drifted off in her own world and she struggled slightly with some topics. But, she had a sort of innate wisdom in her, unlike you. She really was your complete opposite. Where you were cynical and sharp, she was kind and soft. You would never admit this to anyone else, but as you sat there in AP Calculus, you realized you admired her more than any human in the entire world. She was never so clever as to be unkind, however, sometimes she was so kind she forgot to be clever. You didn’t believe in angels. Actually, you didn’t really believe in anything all that much. But the sight of her kindness made you think that perhaps angels were real. 

Obviously, the two of you grew close quickly from junior to senior year. From her waiting for you after classes and walking you to your next, chatting your ear off the whole way, there was no way you couldn’t let her grow on you. Of course, slight guilt ate away at you. Ever since you established you were friends, she was always the one waiting and calling for you. Your school was quite large and you knew for a fact that when you had third period on the fourth floor, she had hers on the first floor. The first time you saw her breathless and sweaty outside your classroom minutes after the bell rang, hand over her chest, you knew you would do anything for this girl. That in and of itself was extremely concerning, however, you brushed it off. All of this led to you standing outside her 5th period classroom with the lunch you had made for the both of you- trying your best to look as friendly as possible.

“What- what are you doing” She giggled. Her hair was done up so beautifully today, blue ribbons adorned her beautifully silky black hair. Before you even noticed what was happening, you felt the bag in your hand being lifted away and two hands pulling at your cheeks instead

“Is this you trying to be friendly? I didn’t even recognize you. You looked so..happy. I’ll be honest, I still do prefer your grumpy panda look.” Rosie chuckled and let go of your cheeks before lightly slapping one of them

“I don’t- Rosie, I don’t look like a grumpy panda.” You huffed. Adjusting your bag and grabbing the lunch from her hands, you began to walk off. Noticing the lack of quick yet soft footsteps padding next to you, you turned around. All Rosie did was grin at you halfway down the hall before rushing over and linking your arm with hers.

“Yes, you do. Because not only do you never smile, you never sleep. Your panda eyes are so noticeable.” She faked an angry look, “I told you to go to sleep earlier. I already know you wake up at five every morning.” She turned away, but not before you heard her mutter, “which is still so fucking weird”.

You turned towards her and mustered up your best winning smile. “Well, maybe I stayed up last night so I could make us this lunch”, you proudly exclaimed. Looking into Rosie’s face, you couldn’t tell what she was thinking. She was staring right back at you with such an odd look in her eyes. You turned away, assuming she was about to ridicule you for being an idiot, you turned your head back to face forward. As your cheeks glowed slightly with embarrassment, you heard her whisper, “that’s so sweet”. You whipped your head back to her and only saw teasing brown eyes staring back.

  
“Okay, don’t get the wrong idea. I only did this because seeing you sprint up and down stairs everyday to wait for me after class made me feel guilty”. You suddenly took on a more serious tone. “You need to take care of yourself, Rosie. It’s not good for you to be sprinting like that. Speaking of, have you taken your medication yet?” You saw her flush red as you sat down at the secluded bench you both usually sat at.  
“No, not yet. I forgot.” She played with the sleeve of your sweatshirt as she sat while still holding your arm.  
“Okay, well you can just take it when we’re finished with lunch. I made your favorite-”, you began pulling out the thermos and boxes of rice you had in the bag, “some kimchi stew”.  
“It’s probably not all that good, seeing as I’m most definitely not a professional chef. But, uh- here you go. I hope you like it.” You blushed. Of course you’ve cooked before. You weren’t terribly good at it, but you were alright. However, you’d never given the food you made to anyone before. It was a little bit too intimate for you. Last night, though, you had no idea why, but you had wanted to make Chaeyoung something. Watching anxiously as she took a bite, you crossed your legs and pretended to people-watch instead of nervously awaiting her reaction.  
“Y/n.” You heard a whispered “oh my god” from the girl next to you, “Y/n, this is the best kimchi stew I’ve ever had.” Chaeyoung said gravely. You almost barked out a laugh. Instead, you turned to face her and said in the most serious tone you could manage, “thank you, it took many years of practice to perfect and hone the skill”. She shoved your shoulder and giggled like a madwoman when you almost slipped off the bench.  
“Is it really good? Don’t try to spare my feelings.” There was an odd pressure you felt for her to like it.  
“Do you even need to ask? You know I’m too honest to lie. Especially to you. You have such an odd knack for telling when people are lying to you, I’d never get away with it.” Rosie took another bite and looked up at you, still chewing, and gave a small smile. You wondered if she was aware of how adorable she was.  
“Of course you wouldn’t. Now, finish that up and take your medicine.” You realized that you had forgotten the second thermos you had prepared for yourself in your rush this morning. Shrugging it off, you sat back comfortably and prepared for her to begin her rant on whatever caught her attention today. “Wait, what are you going to eat? You said you made this for the both of us.” When you looked up, you saw Chaeyoung had begun to slightly pout.  
“Oh, It’s fine. I accidentally left mine at home.” you stuffed your hands in your pockets and looked down into your lap. You felt soft hands tilt your chin back to look into caring amber eyes. Instead of being met with her “lecture” face, you saw a spoon full of soup brought up in front of your face.  
“Here, we’ll share this. Now say ‘ahh’, Panda.” Chaeyoung looked so determined that all you could do was nod dumbly and open your mouth. As she fed you the soup, your mind began to wander. How could one person be so generous? So loving? You were brought out of your thoughts as you felt Chaeng shake your arm.  
“Look! Y/n, look at how pretty that butterfly is!” You watched transfixed as she sat, eyes gleaming, mouth open in a wide smile. _Beautiful_.  
“Yeah, pretty.” You whispered.  
~~~~~~~~~~~  


“I want to get a dog”  
You choked on the apple slices you had brought to munch on while you walked. When you turned to the black haired girl walking beside you, she merely grinned.  
“I think I’d be an excellent dog mom.” She said proudly.  
“Rosie, it’s a dog. Why on earth would you want a dog.” You wrinkled your nose and continued your walk to the coffee shop. Dogs were smelly, they were dirty. You could go on and on about how much you disliked them, but that would take too much time.  
“Y/n. I like you, I really do, but I’m afraid this is the end of our friendship.” Chaeyoung said and began to walk ahead of you.  
“Hey! Rosie! You can’t just walk away from me! They’re vicious, smelly creatures!” You yelled as you went to catch up with her. She wasn’t serious, was she?  
“Yes, I can. I’m not gonna hang around a dog hater.” Even as you walked next to her, she turned her entire body away from you. You began to poke her side, whispering her name over and over.  
“You’re so annoying, Y/n.” She sighed. “Fine. Say you like dogs right now and I’ll forgive you.” You both had stopped in the middle of the sidewalk.  
“Chaeyoung. I’m not saying I like dogs-” You were cut off by the adorably angry girl in front of you.  
“What was that? I didn’t hear an ‘I love dogs and I love Roseanne Park’ from you.” She was teasing you now, you were sure of it.  
“I- fine. I..tolerate..dogs and I love,” you choked, “I love Roseanne Park”. You grimaced. What was wrong with you? A single sentence and you couldn’t even speak without making a fool of yourself. It was honestly just depressing at this point.  
Chaeyoung had already begun walking again and looped her arms through yours. You heard a thoughtful hum from her before she turned to you and whispered, “I guess I’ll forgive you. But It’s only because you’re a good cook and I need you.” Your mind was running a mile a minute. She needed you. She needed _you_?  
“I’m serious. I want a dog.” Rosie began shaking your arm, “Oh! Y/n! We can be the dog’s mothers!”  
“Absolutely not, Rosie. I may love you, but I don’t love you that much.”  
~~~~~~~  
Perhaps you had lied just a tiny bit. Nevertheless, on Rosie’s 18th birthday, you showed up outside her house in your beaten up Honda. You walked up her doorstep with the heavy box and knocked on her door. As you stood and waited, you panicked. You hadn’t heard anything from the box for a while. Did you not poke enough holes?! Was the thing suffocating?! You frantically rushed back to your car for a pen and walked back up to the door. Frantically stabbing holes into the box as you went. As you assaulted the wrapped cardboard box, you heard the door in front of you creak open.  
“Y/n. Listen, I know gift boxes aren’t really your thing, but you can’t just go around stabbing them.” Chaeyoung giggled.  
“Oh- Rosie. Hi.” You were slightly out of breath from the panicking and sprinting back and forth from your car. Not only were you a fool, you were an out of shape fool.  
“Uhm- Happy Birthday!” You grinned at your friend. She chuckled as she opened the door and told you to come in. You greeted her parents and her sister nervously. It wasn’t like you’d never met them. Chaeyoung and you had been friends for a while now. You just felt the sudden urge to impress them. “How idiotic”, you thought. Rosie said something to her parents before dragging you to her room. You were so out of it, you didn’t even know what was happening. She looked so pretty today, was that a new shirt?  
“Okay, Panda, what’d you get me?” She clapped lightly as she sat on her bed. You remained standing in the middle of her room, shifting your feet.  
“Well- um. Here, open it. Be careful.” You gently put the box down in front of her. You hoped she liked your present, if she didn’t, you could always dig a hole, crawl into it, and never be seen again. You watched as she picked the box up and laughed at how many giant holes you had stabbed through. Suddenly, you heard scratching from the box. Rosie dropped it back onto her bed and screamed.  
“Hey, It’s okay. I didn’t get you anything dangerous. Open it.” You gently encouraged her. She reached for the box and began to unwrap it. Before she had even peered over the side of the box, your present leapt out and landed on its back in her lap.  
“Y/n! Y/n, holy shit! Oh my god! You got me a puppy?!” She gently put her hand out in front of the dog. She was so calm and gentle with the animal, but you could see she was practically bouncing. Her smile was so wide you almost grinned at the sight yourself. You felt your heart pounding in your chest at the sight of her giggling and playing with her new puppy. You looked to the side and snorted as you saw Small Yellow and Joohwangie pressed against their tank, looking at the new competition for Rosies love.  
“What are you going to name it? Or him, it’s a him.” You questioned.  
“Hey! Don’t call my baby an it. Mmm, I think I’ll name him Hank.” She looked so pleased with herself, you couldn’t help but tease her.  
“Hank? Like Hank Green? Oh! Or like,” you suppressed a chuckle, “like a _hank_ erchief?”  
You heard Rosie burst out into laughter.  
“First of all, how dare you! Second of all, that isn’t even how you spell handkerchief. God, Y/n.” She rolled her eyes as she smiled up at you.  
“Okay, okay fine. Hank it is. It’s kind of fitting.”  
“Oh! Look at how much he’s swinging his tail!”  
You smiled at her excitement and began looking around at the new posters she added to her wall. As you stared at her poster wall, you hadn’t noticed the fur ball that came barreling towards your feet.  
Suppressing a yelp, you danced around the teddy bear-like puppy chasing your shoelaces.  
“He-”, She giggled, “he has a very happy tail.” Looking over at Chaeyoung, you saw how proud she was of her own observation. You were about to tease her before Hank began chewing on your shoelaces. Unbeknownst to you, as you jumped around in a hopeless attempt to save your shoes from Hank's teeth, Chaeyoung stared at you in wonder. You were so kind to her, so loving. She knew you didn’t like dogs, and yet you got her one. You had no care for pretty clouds or butterflies, and yet you always sat and stared up at them when she pointed them out. You were one of the few, if not, the only person that even listened to her when she went on her mindless rants. Not only did you listen, but you seemed interested as well. You always did things for her so silently, and yet she felt the overwhelming care and love behind each action, each gift.  
Rosie stood up and shuffled over to where you stood. As you kept bouncing around the playful dog running between your legs, you felt small arms encircle your waist from behind and a soft pressure on your shoulder. Your breath caught in your throat. You could smell Rosie’s perfume from how close she was to you. The feeling of the puppy below you pulling at your shoestrings had become distant. Now, all you felt were soft cheeks pressed to your shoulder blade, the soft and slightly cold arms holding your waist tightly. As she went up on her tiptoes to brush her lips against your ear, whispering her thank yous, you felt like your heart had stopped. In all actuality, it was practically beating out of your chest.   
“Thank you so much, Y/n. You’ll never know how much this means to me. How much you mean to me.” You turned around to face her. As you stood staring down into her wonderful dark amber eyes, you saw everything you had ever wanted.  
“Well, I’d do anything for you, Park Chaeyoung.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo... Did any of yall catch the Taylor Swift reference? :>


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh boy, its spicing up.

“Slow- slow down, holy shit Y/n.” Rosie wheezed.  
“Hey hey hey, are you alright? Breathe. Breathe with me Rosie, come on.” You inhaled and exhaled slowly with the trembling girl in front of you.  
“When you told me I should take a morning run with you, I didn’t know it was going to be like this.” She breathed out. She was in pain. God, you were so stupid. Why on earth would you invite her on a run? Was spending more time with her really worth causing her pain? As you scolded yourself, you felt Rosie lean her entire weight on you as her arms came around your waist.  
“Just- let’s just stay like this for a bit. I’m really tired.” She whispered. Was it her heart again? You’d noticed that lately she got tired so quickly and it worried you. You tried to block it out, but you were going out of your mind. As of right now, though, you focused on the girl in your arms. You leaned back on the tree swaying in the wind, watching as the streets woke up. It was an early Saturday morning when Rosie had texted you that you should both hang out later. You were preparing to go out for a morning run when you suddenly thought of how nice it’d be to run with her as the sun rose. You regretted your foolishness as you felt Rosie struggling to catch her breath in your arms.   
“Can we go home?” She murmured. Your heart leapt into your throat at the words “we” and “home”. Brushing it off, you nodded and stood up straight. As Rosie began to let go of you, you saw her tipping backwards. You grabbed her wrist with one hand and brought the other up to her cheek, inspecting her face.  
“Rosie? Rosie, are you alright?” You asked urgently.  
“I’m fine. I’m okay. I just feel so sleepy.” She smiled up at you, it didn’t reach her eyes.  
“Well, okay then. Um- here, stand here.” You stood in front of her and crouched. “Get on.”  
You felt her hop onto your back slowly. Standing up straight, you adjusted her to make sure she was as comfortable as possible. Usually, she would blush or tease you if you offered to carry her like this. However, it was concerning that she did no such thing and merely clambered on to your back without a word.  
“You okay up there Rosie Posie?” You asked softly. You felt a soft nod and an affirmative hum.  
As you walked back to your house with Chaeyoung on your back, your mind ran a mile a minute. You shuffled through recipes you knew to be heart healthy; checking off ingredients you had and supplies you needed. Drifting off inside your head, you were brought back by the feeling of something wet on your shoulder. You stopped in your tracks.  
“Hey, Rosie.” You didn’t hear anything or feel a nod, but you continued anyways.   
“We’ll be home soon, just hang on a bit for me, okay?” You whispered. Again, you heard nothing, but you felt her arms tightening around you and her head settle into the crook of your neck. You began walking as fast as you could without making Rosie uncomfortable.  
When you arrived home, the house was empty. You had forgotten that your mother was on a business trip for the week and silently rejoiced. Laying Rosie on the couch, you shuffled through the bag she brought and took out her medicine.   
“Have you taken your morning meds?” You saw her shake her head. You got up and went to pour a glass of water for her. When you got back with her medicine and water, you helped her sit up and watched as she took the pills. When she was done, you grabbed a blanket and draped it over her shivering form. As she closed her eyes from exhaustion, you knelt down and hesitantly kissed her forehead.   
“Sleep, okay? I’ll be here when you need me.” You got up and began to walk back to the kitchen to scrounge for ingredients when you heard her call after you.  
“Y/n. Y/n, where’re you going?” She murmured. You smiled.  
“I’m just going to make us some food.” You responded.  
“Can you please stay with me.” She opened up the blanket and the look she gave you melted your heart. Her eyes were red from her crying and her cheeks were puffier than usual. Her signature pout on her lips; even though it was half hearted and she looked ready to pass out. You smiled softly at her.  
“Of course, Chaeng.” As you laid down on the couch, you wrapped your arms around Rosie.   
“You’ll be alright, I-”, you took a deep breath, “I promise”. She smiled and placed her head on your chest, shortly after, you heard soft snores echoing throughout the room. Soon enough, you drifted off as well.   
~~~~~~~~~  
You woke up to light pokes against your cheek and a solid weight on top of you. Your eyes fluttered open only to see Rosie entirely on top of you. Head resting on her arms crossed over your chest as she lifted one finger to poke your nose.  
“Hello, sleepy.” She giggled. “Did you know you’re really snuggly when you’re asleep? Almost like a-”, she grinned, “like a panda.”   
You threw your head back against the couch arm.   
“When will you let it go? I look nothing like a panda!” You whined.   
“Yes, you do.” Rosie scooted up until she was grinning down at you. Your breath caught in your throat, _what was she doing_ , you thought.  
“If it makes you feel any better, you’re my favorite panda.” She breathed. You snorted and almost choked suppressing your laughter.  
“Oh, like you know so many pandas.” You couldn’t hold your laughs in and she began to giggle with you.  
“Alright, scooch. I’m going to go make us lunch.” As you began to sit up, you noticed Rosie hadn’t moved. Instead, she remained seated on your lap, staring at you. Your heart skipped a beat as she continued to stare you down.   
“Come on, Chaeng, I’m gonna make us lunch. It won’t be long.” You nervously chuckled.   
As if she was in a daze, Rosie hastily scrambled out of your lap. Her hair curtained her face, but you could’ve sworn she was blushing.   
While you shuffled around your kitchen collecting tools and ingredients, you remembered the way she looked laying on top of you. You felt your face heat up and began rifling through the contents of your fridge to calm yourself down. Looking through the items, you realized you had little to work with. You remember reading about a broccoli substituted pesto pasta that was apparently beneficial for one's heart, and you had all the ingredients needed. You were by no means a doctor, but the recipe didn’t include anything you knew to be detrimental to heart health. With this in mind, you began setting up the things you’d need.  
Halfway through the cooking process, you heard soft footsteps padding over to where you stood. You felt two arms snaking around your waist and a head pressed against your back.  
“What are you doing?” You laughed.  
“Hugging you. Do you not want me to?” You quickly turned around. Knowing Roseanne Park as well as you did, you knew she was now pouting with tears ready to spill down her cheeks.  
“No! I- I like it when you hug me! I really do!” You rushed out. You heard no response, instead you saw her smiling cheekily at you.  
“You like it when I hug you, Y/n?” She was teasing you, of course she was.   
“Yeah, I do.” You stated firmly, though your voice wavered slightly. You saw her eyes widen with surprise; her cheeks flushing red. Knowing that if she opened her mouth she’d look like a gaping fish, she buried her face in your shoulder.  
“You’re so annoying, Y/n!” She huffed. You grinned.  
You turned around to continue cooking and felt the familiar arms around you along with the warm cheeks pressed to your shoulder once again. You felt her peeking over your shoulder, watching you cook. To be completely honest, it made you slightly nervous.  
Shortly after, you finished up cooking and began plating the pasta. You were quite pleased with yourself, it looked good and it was beneficial for Rosie. That was all you really cared about, anyway. After placing the plates down on your kitchen island, you dragged two chairs over and placed them opposite each other. You waited for Rosie to eat first, you wanted to see if she liked it or not. You knew she’d tell you it was good, but you could never be too sure. For all you knew, she could just be sparing your feelings. As she took a bite, you saw her do her happy food dance.   
“Is it good?” You laughed. She nodded earnestly back in response. You giggled. She looked so happy. Realizing this was a moment you’d like to keep forever, you opened your phone and quickly snapped a photo. You heard her yelp, but you were too busy smiling down at your phone. Rosie had some sauce left on her smiling lips, her eyes closed with her arms raised and blurry from her dancing. She really was so adorable. You put your phone down when you realized she was probably pouting at your interest being directed to anything but her.   
You ate in comfortable silence and finished your food quickly. You got up and took the dishes to the sink to wash them. It was silent throughout the kitchen as you washed. When you finished, you turned around only to find Rosie right behind you. She was blushing and shifting from foot to foot. You looked down at your own feet, suddenly feeling extremely awkward.   
“Thank you, Y/n.” She said suddenly. You snapped your head up and opened your mouth to insist that it really wasn’t anything, but she cut you off.  
“No, thank you. Thank you for all this. Not just for cooking something to make me feel better. Thank you for everything.” Her warm eyes bored into your own. You swallowed whatever idiotic response you were about to offer her and instead nodded. You laced your fingers with hers.  
“Of course, I’ll always do anything for you, Rosie. Always. You’re everything to me.” You murmured.  
“Good, because you’re everything to me too.” She said softly. You couldn’t read the look in her eyes. She kept staring at you like you were something so special, so beautiful. You didn’t get it. Rosie stepped closer to you, eyes watering. She pressed her forehead against your own and wrapped her arms around your neck. Perhaps she wanted to be comforted, so you stepped even closer and slipped your arms around her waist. It was silent for a while. Then, she uttered a simple sentence that set every single inch of your skin on fire.  
“I love you, Y/n”, She choked, “I am hopelessly and undoubtedly in love with you.”   
You almost started shaking from shock, instead, you shifted your head to whisper into her ear.  
“Chaeyoung, can I kiss you?” As soon as you had asked the question, Rosie had pressed her lips against yours. You held her even closer and tighter than before as you poured every single ounce of love you had into a single kiss. When you broke off the kiss, all the pieces fit into place. Every single night spent thinking about Rosie, every moment without her that felt like your life had been put on pause- you finally knew.  
“I love the way you talk to me for hours about everything and nothing.” You kissed the left corner of her mouth.  
“I love the way you say ‘ahh’ every time you drink something.” You kissed the other corner of her mouth.  
“I love the way you point out pretty clouds to me.” You kissed each of her hands.  
“I love the way you shake my arm and point out pretty butterflies to me.” You kissed her cheeks.  
“I love the way you skip over to me only to jump in my arms.” You kissed her forehead.  
“I love the way you always smile back at me when you catch me staring at you.” You kissed her nose.  
“I love the way you make me want to be better.” You smiled at her.  
“And Chaeyoung, I have fallen completely and desperately in love with you.” You pressed a soft kiss to her lips. When you pulled away, she dragged you back and kissed you like it was the last thing she’d ever do. You both smiled widely into the kiss. Rosie once had no idea why she kept plodding along through life. But in your arms, smiling up at you, she knew she’d found the only reason she’d ever need. Perhaps she was dying, but right now she had never felt so alive.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no explanation for the long wait for an update ;-; Anywho- enjoy!

“Y/n, am I your girlfriend now?” You were both huddled up into your couch watching some show that had caught Rosie’s interest when she turned and stared at you.  
“Of course you are! I didn’t reenact some poorly written rom-com scene just for you to _not_ be my girlfriend.” You laughed loudly. You watched as the girl in your arms began to pout.  
“So you didn’t mean what you said? And to think I thought that was from your heart.” She whined.  
“You’re ridiculous, Chaeyoung.” You smiled and held her face in your hands. “Of course that wasn’t from my heart, who do you think I am?” You saw tears well up in your girlfriend's eyes and immediately felt regret and panic wash over you.  
“I’m kidding! I’m kidding, Rosie, I swear I’m kidding! Everything I said I meant with my entire heart and soul!” You rushed out as you pulled her onto your lap.  
She began to punch your chest while attempting to push you off before eventually settling into your lap. It was silent save for the multiple muffled profanities she threw from where she had buried her face in your neck. Suddenly, she jerked up and stared you right in the eye.  
“You better have been kidding, Y/N L/N. Or else I would’ve gotten Hank so he could come bite your ass.” She grumbled.  
“Of course, of course. Completely fair.” You grinned up at Rosie as you brushed her hair out of her face. “I’d never lie to you, Chaeyoung.” You swore.  
You saw her eyes soften into nervousness.  
“Promise?” Her voice wavered as you smiled and kissed her cheek.  
“I promise”, you whispered.  
~~~~~~~~~~~  
Graduation was nearing. The lovers breaking off around you and the tired lamentations of college students in the coffee shops had begun to truly terrify you. Everything was happening so quickly, so soon. Half the time, you felt as if your mind had wandered off for a stroll and never came back. It was as though you were just an aimless robot milling about the Earth. All of this would never last, though. You’d lose yourself, but a soft hand and concerned brown eyes would pull you right back. You were scared. But Chaeyoung was scared as well.

Her mind wanted so many things, but her body couldn’t keep up. There had been too many instances of her begging for a pause, but she knew that as things kept spinning around the both of you, there would be no time for pauses. Everyone was sprinting and Chaeyoung was barely keeping up. She was so happy to have you, though. Whenever she wanted to quit, to just stop, you were right there. You, with the lopsided grin you only gave to her. You, with your heart that loved her just as much as she loved you. You both would make it. She was sure of it. You were both going to the same university, after all, it would all be alright. Still, she worried.

“Chaeng.” A poke to the cheek. “Chaeyoung!” You sing-songed. As the black haired girl turned to look at you, a pout already forming, you laughed.  
“What’s got you worried?” You asked softly. Chaeyoung could feel her heart melt at your gentleness.  
“Don’t you dare tell me it’s nothing. You can tell me anything, Rosie.” You added on as you smiled at her.  
“I’m just worried about graduation. Stuff like that.” She assured you.  
You nodded your head and wrapped an arm around her as you glanced out at your classmates milling around. 

“It’ll be okay. Everything will be fine with us, Rosie Posie. Everything will be fine with you.” You pressed a kiss to her temple before rambling on about getting to your next class. As you stood up and began packing your things away, Chaeyoung wrung her hands and muttered to herself. You figured she was just mumbling under her breath like she usually did and began to pack away her things as well.  
_”I wish you’d stop promising me things that aren’t true.”_  
~~~~~~~~~~~  
“Do you- do you want to know why I love butterflies so much?” Chaeyoung said as she gripped your hand tighter on the way to the local coffee shop.  
“Why?” You smiled at her.  
“They remind me of you.” She answered simply before turning to grin up at you.  
You barked out a laugh. “H-how?”  
“They’re pretty, and they’re strong, but they’re fragile.” Rosie ran her thumb over your knuckles as she spoke. You nodded and kept staring at her. She was so beautiful, it was otherworldly. If you weren’t so caught up with her, you would have loudly protested against her calling you fragile.

“But, you don’t need to worry, Panda. I’ll make sure nothing breaks your heart.” She said as she stared back at you.  
“What if it’s made of glass?” You playfully whispered back.  
“I’ll carry it with me everywhere, and I’ll never let anyone drop it, or touch it. Except for me, of course.” She smiled. Your heart stopped just as it always did when she smiled.  
“Alright Rosie. Don’t- don’t drop it.” You laughed softly.  
“I won’t. But just as long as you promise me you won’t drop mine.” She said as she looked up at the sky, admiring the clouds before glancing at you once again.  
“Promise.” You breathed.  
~~~~~~~~~~~  
Graduation came far too quickly for your liking. One second, you were blindly scrambling through calculus problems. The next second you were sitting on a chair with a blue gown that was far too baggy for your liking draped around you. The sun was far too bright, and in all honesty you just wanted to go home. You began to scan over your classmates, all those people who you doubted even cared who you were. There were so many, some you hated, some you didn’t even know, and only one that mattered. As your eyes settled on the head of familiar black hair, you saw that warm smile you loved. As Rosie made little heart gestures with her hands, you felt the tightness in your chest slip away. It’d be alright. She beamed at you, and as if she could read your thoughts, she nodded. 

The ceremony dragged on for a disgusting amount of time. As you sat through it, you could feel the weight of what was really happening continuously pounding down on to your shoulders. Every name being called meant one more moment closer to the end. You weren’t too sure if you’d be able to handle this so-called “end” that loomed over your mind. However, in the hurricane of your own thoughts, time still passed. This meant there was only one more person to be called until it was your turn to walk across that stage and say goodbye to almost everything you’ve ever known.

The graduation ceremony continued on as you practically begged whatever higher being there was out there to make it end quicker. Of course, every single ounce of excitement you possibly could carry within you made an appearance as Chaeyoung was called to accept her diploma and walked across the stage. The whoops from your classmates was deafening. You couldn’t blame them, though, there was a reason your girlfriend was popular among the school for being dangerously beautiful. You didn’t want to be outcompeted by your classmates, so you screamed and cheered so loudly you felt all the oxygen leave your lungs. You definitely had to take a couple minutes afterwards to catch your breath.

“Y/N L/N.” The drawl of your name coming from one of your school’s many administrators brought you out of your head. As you strode across the stage with your signature plastic smile, shaking various people’s hands, you heard cheers. Albeit slightly quieter than the cheers that rang for your other classmates. It was customary to cheer for each other in this particular moment, but none of the whoops and hollers soothed you. That is- until you heard that familiar accent ringing out just a tad louder than the rest. Well, actually, a lot louder than the rest.  
“That’s my beautiful girlfriend right there! That’s my genius darling!” Rosie screamed and cheered. You shook your head when you realized she’d probably completely blown out her vocal chords. As you walked off to the staircase that would lead you back to your seat, the grin plastered over your face was completely genuine. 

“1, 2, 3!” Alice said as she snapped photo after photo of you and Chaeyoung.  
“Where’s your mum, Y/N?” She questioned after realizing that your mother was nowhere to be found despite seeing her at the beginning of the ceremony.

“Ah.. she must have been called out for a work thing.” You dismissed with a smile and wave of your hand. Alice nodded her head and began ordering you and her sister to do various poses once again. As you obeyed every command of the older girl in front of you, you felt a warm hand squeezing yours. You looked to your side to see Chaeng smiling in that understanding manner of hers. You squeezed her hand in return and leant over to press a kiss to her brow. You were alright; she was with you, and her family that loved you like you were their own was here. She nodded her head and the two of you continued your graduation photo session.  
~~~~~~~~~  
Moving day hit you like an 18-wheeler. Perhaps it was all the cooking you had been doing for Rosie and yourself recently that had you wheezing over a box of Hank’s toys.  
“Y/N. Y/N, love, they’re just toys. They aren’t weights. Which also means they’re light and that furthers my argument that I can carry it myself.” Rosie reminded you as she sipped on a bottle of water.  
“I’m sorry Attorney Park, that I want to make sure my girlfriend doesn’t have to lift a single finger in this oh so arduous task.” You deadpanned while you moved to lift another box into the van. 

“Hey, I’m not even going into law!” She whined from her spot on the street-side curb.  
“Oh, right. Apologies, my lovely future Picasso.” You drawled as you loaded the last box into the moving van that would be setting off today in order to be there by the time you both arrived at your apartment. The now silver-haired girl beside you giggled.  
“I’m not Picasso, Y/N.” She gently reminded you.  
“What was that? I thought I heard the voice of the most beautiful and talented woman to ever exist.” You jested. Chaeyoung stood and wrapped her arms around your neck and hid her face in the junction between your throat and collarbone. You laughed aloud at the blatant embarrassment radiating off the girl in your arms. As you shook with laughter against her, Chaeng pinched the back of your neck causing you to yelp.

“Hey! Punishment should not be dealt to those who tell the truth!” You whined.  
“Shut up, you big baby.” Chaeyoung shot back at you. You wrapped your arms around her waist to bring her into a bear hug. She giggled as you began to slowly spin in circles.  
“You’ll be stuck with this big baby for the next four years, Chaengie. Oh! And of course the eternity that follows those four years.” You hummed contentedly as you felt her smile against your skin.  
“Eternity it is, Y/N.” She murmured against your ear.  
“Eternity it is.” You whispered back.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
College life was by all means, a pain. Of course, it was to be expected. However, there was some foolish part of you that dared to dream it could be something like the romanticized versions seen in movies. You were, of course, severely disappointed. 

It was 2:30 in the morning and yet you still hadn’t finished a stupid essay assigned simply because the professor was too lazy to actually teach. No- no now you had to sit here instead of cuddling with Rosie because Mister What’s His Face decided to put you through another bout of pointless torture. Honestly, it was like they had nothing better to do than punish students.

“Baby?” You heard a soft voice call out behind you.  
“What’s up Chae? Did I wake you up? I’m sorry.” You pushed back from the small table in your kitchen as you walked over to where your girlfriend stood in the entryway.  
“No, you didn’t wake me up. I’ve been awake for awhile.” She said as she stared at her fingers playing at the hem of her shirt.  
“What’s wrong?” You questioned as you wrapped her up in your arms.  
“Nothing. It’s nothing.” You knew she was lying but you decided to not push it and just continue holding her.

Minutes passed with you two in the same position. As you stroked Chaeyoung’s hair, you felt something wet against your chest. You gently pulled away and held her face in your hands.  
“What’s wrong Rosie Posie?” You murmured as you kissed away the tears falling from her eyes.  
“I’m- I’m worried. I’m so stressed, Panda.” She hiccuped. Your heart leapt at the despair in her voice.  
“Tell me, Chae. Please. Tell me so I can help you.” You pleaded.  
“It’s just- it’s just school stuff. There’s so many assignments, I feel like I’m not doing well enough.” She was lying. There was no way she could tell you the real reason. Sometimes, it was better to lie about these kinds of things. At least, that’s what she told herself to feel better. She really did hate lying; especially to you.

“Okay. Okay Chaengie. Here, let’s go to bed. You’ll feel better and then we can work out a way to solve this together. Wait a second while I put all this junk away.” You gestured vaguely to the school supplies strewn across the table. As you pulled away, you giggled at the way Rosie clung to your shirt.  
“Alright, I suppose you can cling on while I sort this mess. I thought I was the panda bear.” You laughed and began cleaning.

When you had finished tidying up, you began to walk you and Rosie back to your shared bedroom. You fell asleep as soon as your back hit the bed and your girlfriend had snuggled up close to you. While you drifted off into a peaceful sleep, Rosie stroked the features of your face. She smiled as she watched you twitch your nose. You were happy, you had that calm look on your face and it made Rosie’s heart burst. As she retracted her hand and attempted to fall asleep, the worries and anxieties that had plagued her before had came back. What a horrible juxtaposition it was, as you fell into a dreamless sleep, while she ran from the doctor’s needles and grim voices that bore her fate. The heart-shattering reminders and gentle, desperate and empty reassurances that chased her in her dreams and thoughts.


End file.
